As a kid, Christmas was a big deal with setting up the tree and getting our picture taken around it. I don't remember the whole house being transformed however. I also don't remember family gatherings and meals. But to be fair, it all ended when I was 12. My grandmother had no interest in the traditions of Christmas.
What I do remember is one or two meaningful gifts rather than being bombarded by stuff for the sake of show. The winter boots we needed or the coat we loved. Practical stuff mostly with perhaps a toy or two thrown in. I don't know where the money came from - perhaps Mom herself like the idea to buy her a coffee pot, but I remember the feeling of pride in giving it to her. I don't remember the Christmas feast but I remember her letting me help her cook Crostili. One of the staples she made every holiday season. I got to dust them with icing sugar...and sneak a few.
The only Christmas we got loaded down with toys was the years we got a Christmas "basket" from a local charitable organization. Thinking back now, I know that is what it was and that Mom was probably on welfare or unemployment while she was trying to go to University to get a degree. I think it was so impressionable because we had never received toys in that kind of abundance. Many of the Barbies were used but they were loved by us, well not my brother. Lol!
Having said that, when my own kids came along. I spoiled them as if they had aunts and uncles and grandparents to do it. But then there came a time when we were on our own and finances were tight and we had to stop and rethink the meaning of Christmas. Gifts became more meaningful and less reliant on the consumerism that had become Christmas. We saw kids that demanded the latest and greatest toy - so named by the commercials on TV. If commercials weren't enough, Saturday morning cartoons had become little more than 1/2 hour long commercials promoting spin-off toys. I watched Bugs Bunny and Road Runner cartoons for years and never saw the product tie-ins like you do today. In any case the must have toy could be had for a song if you had the patience to wait for the spring when it would end up in the unused toy box at the garage sale. The countless hours, gas and energy put into finding the "must-have" toy now on sale for 90% discount. At least!
I'm not suggesting a gift-free Christmas, I'm suggesting do your shopping with the love of Christ in your heart not the love of Chri$t. Buying a starter kitchen tool set for a gourmet cook is probably not a well thought out gift and a waste of money. Winter mitts and scarves for your aunt in Florida also not the best choice. And to that end, when you are facing the daunting task of wrapping the mound of presents you see before you, do it with love in your heart and you will be sure to put the right name tag with the right gift, rather than just unloading those impulse buys that the marketing machine thrust upon you.
Speaking personally, I would rather have nothing than something that I will feel hurt thinking about because you really don't know me and I thought we were so close. I do think re-gifting is a good thing provided thought goes into it. So, that hammer that I got that I can add to my collection of 2 I already have would go to my friend that is interested in volunteering for Habitat for Humanity but is new to the field. I may even add work gloves and safety goggles to go with it. I don't think used gifts should be re-gifted as new but having said that, if I have something in my home that I know you love or would make use of, I would share the joy that the item brought me with you. Better to be re-loved than thrown in the garbage for sure.
The bottom line is really this...in the end will you remember that mountain of gifts you got in any given year? No, you probably won't. But I guarantee you will remember and be hurt by the thoughtless gifts. And above all, 20 years hence you will remember the people and the feelings of Christmas. Religious or not, you will remember the love! This is my Christmas wish for you. LOVE!
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